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Sarah, 18, Singapore
(click the flower above for older entries)

Twitter: @sarahbananachan
Instagram: hisarahnademe

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hopeless pining and second guessing

on a lighter note: finally replied my fs questions!!! i received over 30 t_t oh the horror sorry if i didn't reply yours because some were repeated some were too sensitive for me to answer and et cetera and sorry I took so long :( feel feel to drop a message and i'll definitely get back to you as soon as i can!

1) So terribly sorry blog post with pictures real soon because I know you hate reading so much words am I right?
2) First things first AEM was thebomb.com!!! :-) Such an incredible experience, didn't expect to have so much fun, cross my heart. Loved the company, miss my fellow radio djs. Already missing the campus and stuff although I'm not intending on going there, it was just a really good experience. Had so much fun with Tammy aka Tamara ;) and chatting in the studio room for more than 2hours, choreographing random dances, reading magazines in our clove, the "fogly family" with tammy nikki ariel and I, speaking into microphones and being a dj. So much fun.
3) You know you're really blessed when your friends think of you when they're overseas. I have great friends which I don't deserve.
4) 1 more month plus to mid years, shut the front door.
5) I have been questioning my capability cos I realise I never get things I want, not like the little material things, but things I really want.
6) I love Mulan and Tangled and Lilo and Stitch so much they are my love
7) Thinking a lot of unnecessary thoughts, enough enough enough be gone thoughts
8) Going to work harder and make myself better
9) No scratch that going to work my ass off and erase all flaws in my system, wish me luck!

I want a random tea room and then I'll place like little teacups in there and all we can do is drink tea

You know how some people are like super duper sure about who they are? Guys, will you tell me your secret? I am like so lost about who I am right now

I can't tell if I'm the type that loves uniformity and studies or freedom and art. Both sides are pulling me and I can't tell which one I am. I love formulas and regularity but I love expression. I love poetry and literature but I love math and science. I love art and photography and watercolours and fashion but (honestly) I love sitting down and completing my homework. I love numbers and statistics and stability and all but I love words and analysing and literature. I love logic but I love passion. I love practicality but at the same time I love recklessness.

SuA knows exactly what she wants, she knows she wants to go to an arts school and study design because she feels studies are so useless to her. I think she's so lucky cause she's so certain. I know what I want to do too (I think). I want to study medicine and go to university and get a degree and everything but I just want to understand myself better. That's all.
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